Listening: An important component of communication that we evade

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Listening: An important component of communication that we evade

If we were supposed to talk more than we listen, we would have two tongues and one ear.” Remarked by Mark Twain, an easy way to remember that listening can be twice as important as talking. As a student, you most likely spend many hours in a classroom doing a large amount of focused listening, yet sometimes it is difficult to apply those efforts to communication in other areas of your life. As a result, your listening skills may not be all they could be.

Listening is a skill of critical significance in all aspects of our lives--from maintaining our personal relationships, to getting our jobs done, to taking notes in class, to figuring out which bus to take to the airport. Regardless of how we're engaged with listening, it's important to understand that listening involves more than just hearing the words that are directed at us. Listening is an active process by which we make sense of, assess, and respond to what we hear.

Listening is the ability to accurately receive and interpret messages in the communication process. Listening is key to all effective communication, without the ability to listen effectively messages are easily misunderstood – communication breaks down and the sender of the message can easily become frustrated or irritated. If there is one communication skill you should aim to master then listening is it. Listening is so important that many top employers provide listening skills training for their employees. 

This is not surprising when you consider that good listening skills can lead to: better customer satisfaction, greater productivity with fewer mistakes, increased sharing of information that in turn can lead to more creative and innovative work.Active listening is a particular communication technique that requires the listener to provide feedback on what he or she hears to the speaker, by way of restating or paraphrasing what they have heard in their own words. The goal of this repetition is to confirm what the listener has heard and to confirm the understanding of both parties. The ability to actively listen demonstrates sincerity, and that nothing is being assumed or taken for granted. Active listening is most often used to improve personal relationships, reduce misunderstanding and conflicts, strengthen cooperation, and foster understanding.

When engaging with a particular speaker, a listener can use several degrees of active listening, each resulting in a different quality of communication with the speaker. This active listening chart shows three main degrees of listening: repeating, paraphrasing, and reflecting.

It’s easy to mistake listening as a simple, passive task, but it requires more than just the ability to absorb information from someone else. Listening is a process, and an active one. No matter how you’re communicating with another person, the key is to pay attention to the speaker. Focus all of your energy on them. Here are few tips to improve listening:

  • Stop Talking. Don't talk, listen.  When somebody else is talking listen to what they are saying, do not interrupt, talk over them or finish their sentences for them.  Stop, just listen.  When the other person has finished talking you may need to clarify to ensure you have received their message accurately.

  • Avoid Personal Prejudice Try to be impartial. Don't become irritated and don't let the person’s habits or mannerisms distract you from what the speaker is really saying. Everybody has a different way of speaking - some people are for example more nervous or shy than others, some have regional accents or make excessive arm movements, some people like to pace whilst talking - others like to sit still. Focus on what is being said and try to ignore styles of delivery.

  • Listen for Ideas – Not Just Words. You need to get the whole picture, not just isolated bits and pieces. Maybe one of the most difficult aspects of listening is the ability to link together pieces of information to reveal the ideas of others. With proper concentration, letting go of distractions, and focus this becomes easier.

  • Avoid distractions. This is obvious. Don’t have your cellphone out, or your iPod in, or the television on. Don’t try to divide your attention between the speaker and something else. You might think you’re good at multi-tasking, and perhaps you are, but demonstrating a commitment to the act of listening will make you a more respected person among your peers.

  • Don’t interrupt the speaker. You might want to make an assumption about what the speaker is saying, or what they’re about to say – don’t. It’s rude, and you may find your assumption was wrong, which is beneficial to no one. You can, however, practice nonverbal feedback cue, such as nodding, to demonstrate your attention.

  • Don’t rehearse your response. Not yet. At this stage, your job is only to listen. If you start to plan a speech while the other person is speaking, you’re going to miss certain points and not be able to respond to their larger message when it’s your turn to talk.

  • Don’t complete the speaker’s sentences. This is a presumptuous and rude way to segue into your own response. It impedes on the receiving process, and will make the original speaker want to listen to you less.

  • Address the speaker’s points. It will make it easier for the speaker to transition into a listener when they know exactly what part of their message you’re addressing.

While each stage seems like a lengthy process, this all happens in a very short amount of time, and should feel natural during a conversation. All you’re doing by practicing these tips is making yourself more conscious of the way you communicate, and the bad habits you should avoid in the listening process. Listening is the most important part of communication, because if you fail to understand the message being expressed to you, you will also fail in providing a substantial and meaningful response. This is the root cause of many arguments, misunderstandings, and complications, whether at home, school, or work. Being able to take control of the listening process will turn you into a better communicator, overall.

 Source : udimy(blog)

             Skillsyouneed (website)

             Boundless(website)

The author of this article is Asst. Professor Pioneer Institute of Professional Studies Indore.

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